My Friend Laurie Shares Her Colorectal Cancer Story

How she was diagnosed, how she’s doing now, and her advice for anyone hesitant to schedule their screening test.

March is Colorectal Cancer Awareness month. Given that colorectal cancer rates are rising among people under the age of fifty and that current recommendations for colorectal cancer screening start at age forty-five, Hot & Bothered is the perfect platform to remind you to schedule your screening, if you haven’t already.

I’ll be writing more about screening options next week. In the meantime, I reached out to my beautiful friend Laurie to see if she’d be willing to share her colorectal cancer story with us.

To say she has been through it is an understatement. Her ability to find beauty in the world despite suffering through a marathon of difficult treatments is truly inspiring. And her advice for anyone who feels hesitant to schedule their screening is full of wisdom and love.

Feel free to send her some encouragement or a quick thank you in the comments after reading her story. Or just send some positive vibes out into the universe - I have no doubt they’ll find their way to her.

xo, Rebecca

Tell us the story of your diagnosis.

I was diagnosed with Colorectal cancer when I was 40 years old, 5 years shy of the recommended age for screening colonoscopies. My symptoms were very minor, and easily attributed to common issues many women my age face: blood in my stool explained as postpartum hemorrhoids and subtle shifts in my digestive patterns explained as perimenopause changes or possibly IBS.

My symptoms were mild, but I was starting to get more discomfort when I used the bathroom and the blood in my stool started to be more of a brownish color. I just didn’t feel like it was nothing. I felt a nagging feeling that I needed to take it seriously, especially because of my grandmother's history with colon cancer.

We had recently relocated so it took several months to get established with new doctors and to be referred to specialists etc. Because of my age and my symptoms it was assumed that it wasn’t anything to be concerned about. So when I received my diagnosis it was shocking, devastating and surreal.

What - if anything - did you know about colorectal cancer prior to your diagnosis?

Prior to my diagnosis my exposure to CRC was superficial in retrospect, but I was aware that it had been unexplainably increasing among people under 50. I unfortunately knew of a few other young people like myself who had gone through it, or tragically, not survived it. Still, I never thought I would be one of them. I’ve always lived a very healthy lifestyle and don’t fit into the boxes that I had read were risk factors, such as eating diets high in processed or red meat (I’m a pescatarian), drinking excess soda or alcohol, being obese, smoking, or having a sedentary lifestyle.

My paternal grandmother died of CRC when she was 58. She was diagnosed just days before I was born. My parents changed my name to honor her. She died only 3 months later, so I never got to know her. I had feared that having a family history put me at greater risk, but after we did genetic counseling following my diagnosis, we learned it was purely coincidental that I also had colon cancer and that there was no genetic link in my case. Which is a relief for my siblings and children. The recommendation for them is to be screened 10 years prior to the age of my diagnosis.

Knowing what you know now, what do you want other women to understand about colorectal cancer?

Don’t let anyone tell you your symptoms are probably nothing. Hopefully that is true, and it probably is! But, you need to advocate for yourself. No one else will do it. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or bring up “minor” things with your doctor. Women are socialized to minimize their problems and men are socialized not to take them seriously. So sadly, you really have to work against a system to get your needs met sometimes.

What symptoms do you continue to manage post-treatment?

I am just about 2 years into my diagnosis and I am just finishing up my 2nd round of maintenance chemo. It’s a full-on marathon. I don’t think I fully grasped that from the onset. I think there is a mentality of, “Ok, let’s fix this and get back to life.” The reality is, there is no returning to that previous life. This is not a blip on the radar type of illness, even in the best case scenarios.

I have many symptoms that I continue to deal with, which have all been side effects of chemotherapy, radiation or surgery: chronic pain, permanent neuropathy in my feet, changes in my overall energy levels. Radiation put me into early menopause at age 41, so I have to manage those symptoms as well. Thankfully, Rebecca kindly helped me navigate that situation! I have an estrogen patch that helps manage my hot flashes and night sweats and my life is so much better on account of that!

During chemo I also had to deal with nausea, hair loss, fatigue and brain fog. I literally couldn’t read a book for a year after starting chemotherapy. My focus and attention was so fuzzy.

And of course, these are just the physical symptoms. There is a lot of trauma and emotional distress that comes with this type of diagnosis. It is very challenging. It truly affects every single aspect of my life… relationships, making any kinds of plans, work, socializing, faith, etc.

With that being said, I will say my quality of life in spite of all of that is very good. My oncologist told me the day I was diagnosed that there would be bad days but there would be more good days. I honestly didn’t believe him, but he was right. I’ve learned to live with joy and sorrow as companions and have had deep empathy carved into my soul that I never could have had otherwise. I am forced to live in the present moment and not the future or past; this way of living affords many opportunities for finding beauty and contentment.

What practices/things do you find healing as you continue to recover?

The greatest healer for me has been spending as much time in nature as possible. There are so many metaphors and lessons the earth has to teach us. It is an unpredictable and wild place, yet it still manages to have a rhythm and order to it and it is just full of so much beauty and wonder.

I am an artist by profession, so painting and drawing have also been lifelines for me. Creativity is how I process the world around me. It is healing and meditative for me and keeps me focused on the space that I can control- which is only the present moment I inhabit.

I started a side hobby outside of my professional art work of birding and painting the birds we identify. My two younger children join me. It is a beautiful exercise and provides so much connection with my children. My hope is that I am teaching them the necessity of trusting our senses, focusing on learning to do slow things and how vital the skill of observation is to our survival.

Additionally, doing gentle yoga and seeing a therapist regularly have helped keep me grounded throughout all the chaos and unpredictability.

What advice would you give to someone who is reluctant to get screened for colorectal cancer?

Life is short. It’s fragile and precious and hard and there really isn’t much in this life you can control. So why not take advantage of the little things you can control to try to make your life as rich, meaningful and long as possible? It’s a small thing in the grand scheme of things that could literally save your life. I can promise any discomfort you experience would be a drop in the ocean of how cancer can upend your life - and not just for you, but for all of your loved ones as well. If nothing else, do it for them.